Monday, August 20, 2007
wishes come true part 2 reloaded
then he took out something from his pocket. i can see that it is sharp and pointed. it's a knife. a kitchen knife? why is he taking that out? he points the kitchen knife at me. this man is damn dangerous. full of tricks and with his powers, why did he have to even use a knife? will he harm me like he said he would if i don't obey his orders? i don't want to die. at least after the steamboat dinner right? or will he dig out my eyes? then i will go blind. but not to worry. even weilian can become superstar, why can't i? lol. why am i thinking of all these?what is going to happen to my life? oh please, God, help me. i am in trouble. just as i prayed, i hear someone from above telling me "i am helping you. think."
ya, you are. thanks ar ... i thought. i CAN make this situation to my advantage.
conn: so how, what's your wish?
then he waves his knife at me. it's very dangerous. and i am scared. i tell you, all the unarm combat that i had learned in my army days are all forgotten. well, not really all. still remember some break falls, but what's the use of a break fall over here? (in case u dun know what is a break fall, it is a skill whereby you fall down hard on the ground, but you use your arm or arms to slap the ground hard so that you can lessen the impact upon hitting the ground thus not breaking your bones ... but i think it will break your arms) so i did the next best thing i know. i kneel down on my knees and beg the old man to let me go.
me: please let me go... i am really sorry to see you. nice meeting you, but please let me go. don't stab me with the knife. it will be very painful, and i may dirty your very nice shirt and tie. please don't kill me!!
conn: kill you? haha, dun make me laugh. why would i need a knife to kill you when i have my powers?
just then he took out an apple from his pocket and start shaving the apple skin off the apple -_-"
conn: want an apple? it's more healthy then smoking.
me: wtf ... i thought you are going to kill me with that?
i point to his knife. he looks at me as if i am from woodbridge.
conn: no no no. i cannot kill you. it's against the rule of the game to kill people.
me: what rules? i dun care what rules, but it is confirm a good rule. lol. so you are going to let me go?
conn: no no no!! i cant. you have to make a wish and i have to grant it before i can let you go. by the way, can i use your toilet? i am quite urgent since just now.
me: err ... you need to pee one meh ... thought you got powers?
conn: i am not alien, of course i need to pee. even aliens need to pee. dun you know they use their fingers to pee? haven you watch scary movie 3?
me: err ... i did but it just did not cross my mind.
i am quite wary to let this man into my house. my only form of comfort zone. what happens if he turn nasty and do something funny like burn my flat down? that will be terrible. i will miss my bed and my aircon. but anyway, come to think about it, i have 3 houses i can go to, so it does not really matter, or does it?
me: all right, i can let you go to the loo, but you must promise me you don't do anything funny and leave after you finish your business.
conn: no no, i cant leave until you make a wish. really, any wish will be just fine with me.
me: all right, just come with me. but your plane-machine how? park here without parking ticket will get fine one. as i have said, singapore is a fine city you know. that time when i drive my father's car and park downstairs overnight, i am so afraid that i will get a ticket, but lucky never. really lucky man. old man, you got to do something about it.
conn: he is michael. my super floater. say hi, michael.
michael: pi pi poo pu pi.
me: hmmm ... sound more like a horn to me ... hello michael.
i think i am getting as crazy as this man, actually saying hello to a machine.
conn: i am sorry, that was his fart. he farts when he gets horny .... i will keep him out of sight.
then he place his invisible coat over his super floater and claims that he is invisible to normal people but i can still see him. does that means i am not normal? hee.
me: -_- ' ' fart? when he is horny? wtf ... anyway, i take you to my house. follow me, this way.
then conn follows me to my house. i never lock my door since i thought i just throw my rubbish and smoke for a short while, who knows this thing happens and took up so much of my time.
conn: you never lock your house? you know how dangerous it is? anyone might just come in and steal your things. you need to lock it.
me: blah blah ... i just went out for a short while so quit nagging k, it's not your house anyway. toilet is in front turn right. dun soil my floor hor ... aim properly.
conn sort of like did a little run to the toilet and i can tell he is really urgent. wonder if he heard me about soiling the floor. i got him a coke from the fridge and one for myself too. really need a drink after all these unusual things happening to me. i sit down on my soft sofa and begin to think of what the old man said. a wish? he CAN grant me a wish? wow, what would i wish for? i want to have a lot of money. maybe 1 million dollars? no, not enough ... 50 millions? hmmm ... that will be nice. 100 million? hee. that will be even better. then i don't have to study so hard in school anymore. i am not doing well anyway. but CAN i really believe the man? this question is very questionable.
conn: i hope you are thinkning of a wish ...
i never hear him come out of the toilet with so much thoughts occupying my head.
me: i hope you flush.
conn: opps, sorry i forgot.
and with a twitch of his fingers, i heard the toilet flush. wow, he really have some powers.
me: have a coke, as i pointed to the drink.
conn: no no, sorry, i dun drink gasy drinks. they make me fat and bloat. do you have plain water?
ai yo, this guy so fussy, might as well dun drink. but holding my own CAN of drink makes me wonder. maybe that's why i am having the size i am having today. shall cut down, i reminded myself. i went to the kitchen to get both of us a glass of purified diamond water. then i saw the kitchen knife there on the sink. i took it and hide it at the back of my short and hide it well out of sight. i got a plan.
me: here's your water. dun worry, i never drug it.
conn: i know. but why you take the kitchen knife for what? you want to cut something?
i got caught with my act of wanting to kill conn and i quickly lie my way through.
me: oh ya, i want to let you have a look at this specially crafted knife. i think it is way better than your's cause it is sharper and better, to shave your apples, and it is quite cheap. if you buy one today, i will give you another one for free!! all for just $599 but wait, if you buy now, i will add in a very nice butter knife use to cut butter and spread on your bread. but wait, i know you still find it too expensive, so i am giving you one year supply of very fattening butter to go along with your butter knife. so how, interested to buy?
i look at conn with my innocent eyes and try my best to look real.
conn: cut the crap ... put the knife back. we still have serious business to do.
i gladly put the knife back, so silly of me to make up such a stupid story. i know i am not a good salesman nor a good lier so why bothered.
conn: so how, thought of your wish already?
me: no, not really. are there any restrictions to your wish, i mean, really any wish also can meh? how come so good one? better than winning 4D. lol.
conn: ya, there are some restrictions, like no harming of another person's life. includes no killing or wishing someone dead ....
me: damn, how i wish osama will die right now, so that there will be no more terrorist attacks on poor london. talking about london, why are you going to london for?
conn: cause london bridge is falling down ... no la, just joking.
me: orh, i never thought u CAN joke. ok, why did the chicken cross the playground?
conn: har ... dun know ... why?
me: to get to the other slide la ... haha haha.
conn: not funny, so you want to be a chicken? you want hen or cock?
me: a cock, but i want a really big one cause mine is a bit samll :(
just then i think i heard, pi pi poo pu pi ...
me: your michael farts again ...
conn: ya, he gets horny once in a while. enough of jokes ... tell me, what do you really want in your life?
me: i want money, lots of it ...
conn: really? no second thoughts?
a part of my brain said just go ahead with that wish, but another part of my brain says otherwise. there are so many things in life that i want to have. not just money. there are many things that money cannot buy. like love, relationship with family, friends, turning back time ... do i really just want the money?
me: ok, wait, i have second thought. i wish that the 911 incident had never happen.
conn: i am sorry, another restriction to granting a wish is that if something had already happened, i can't unchange it. for example if someone died long ago, i can't bring him back to life. your wish got to be something that have not happen before.
damn, so my wish of becoming a superstar on project superstar cannot happen already since weilian and kelly got it already. like reading my thoughts, conn said something that make me take aback.
conn: do you know how weilian got into the finals of project superstars on channel u and wins it? he made a wish and i make it happen for him. if not how you think he CAN get so far? i met him and grant this wish for him.
me: my God, no wonder he is always through to the next round and the next ... but why did he not choose to have his eye sight back when he can wish for that?
conn: hello ahbang aka brother, you never listen to me properly izzit? i said i can't undo things that had already happened. so of course i can't let him have his eye sight back. plus he says he is used to seeing things in the dark already and he really likes to sing and he wishs that he wins the superstar thing. i had granted his wish. i can make it happen for you too. so what is it?
ya, you are. thanks ar ... i thought. i CAN make this situation to my advantage.
conn: so how, what's your wish?
then he waves his knife at me. it's very dangerous. and i am scared. i tell you, all the unarm combat that i had learned in my army days are all forgotten. well, not really all. still remember some break falls, but what's the use of a break fall over here? (in case u dun know what is a break fall, it is a skill whereby you fall down hard on the ground, but you use your arm or arms to slap the ground hard so that you can lessen the impact upon hitting the ground thus not breaking your bones ... but i think it will break your arms) so i did the next best thing i know. i kneel down on my knees and beg the old man to let me go.
me: please let me go... i am really sorry to see you. nice meeting you, but please let me go. don't stab me with the knife. it will be very painful, and i may dirty your very nice shirt and tie. please don't kill me!!
conn: kill you? haha, dun make me laugh. why would i need a knife to kill you when i have my powers?
just then he took out an apple from his pocket and start shaving the apple skin off the apple -_-"
conn: want an apple? it's more healthy then smoking.
me: wtf ... i thought you are going to kill me with that?
i point to his knife. he looks at me as if i am from woodbridge.
conn: no no no. i cannot kill you. it's against the rule of the game to kill people.
me: what rules? i dun care what rules, but it is confirm a good rule. lol. so you are going to let me go?
conn: no no no!! i cant. you have to make a wish and i have to grant it before i can let you go. by the way, can i use your toilet? i am quite urgent since just now.
me: err ... you need to pee one meh ... thought you got powers?
conn: i am not alien, of course i need to pee. even aliens need to pee. dun you know they use their fingers to pee? haven you watch scary movie 3?
me: err ... i did but it just did not cross my mind.
i am quite wary to let this man into my house. my only form of comfort zone. what happens if he turn nasty and do something funny like burn my flat down? that will be terrible. i will miss my bed and my aircon. but anyway, come to think about it, i have 3 houses i can go to, so it does not really matter, or does it?
me: all right, i can let you go to the loo, but you must promise me you don't do anything funny and leave after you finish your business.
conn: no no, i cant leave until you make a wish. really, any wish will be just fine with me.
me: all right, just come with me. but your plane-machine how? park here without parking ticket will get fine one. as i have said, singapore is a fine city you know. that time when i drive my father's car and park downstairs overnight, i am so afraid that i will get a ticket, but lucky never. really lucky man. old man, you got to do something about it.
conn: he is michael. my super floater. say hi, michael.
michael: pi pi poo pu pi.
me: hmmm ... sound more like a horn to me ... hello michael.
i think i am getting as crazy as this man, actually saying hello to a machine.
conn: i am sorry, that was his fart. he farts when he gets horny .... i will keep him out of sight.
then he place his invisible coat over his super floater and claims that he is invisible to normal people but i can still see him. does that means i am not normal? hee.
me: -_- ' ' fart? when he is horny? wtf ... anyway, i take you to my house. follow me, this way.
then conn follows me to my house. i never lock my door since i thought i just throw my rubbish and smoke for a short while, who knows this thing happens and took up so much of my time.
conn: you never lock your house? you know how dangerous it is? anyone might just come in and steal your things. you need to lock it.
me: blah blah ... i just went out for a short while so quit nagging k, it's not your house anyway. toilet is in front turn right. dun soil my floor hor ... aim properly.
conn sort of like did a little run to the toilet and i can tell he is really urgent. wonder if he heard me about soiling the floor. i got him a coke from the fridge and one for myself too. really need a drink after all these unusual things happening to me. i sit down on my soft sofa and begin to think of what the old man said. a wish? he CAN grant me a wish? wow, what would i wish for? i want to have a lot of money. maybe 1 million dollars? no, not enough ... 50 millions? hmmm ... that will be nice. 100 million? hee. that will be even better. then i don't have to study so hard in school anymore. i am not doing well anyway. but CAN i really believe the man? this question is very questionable.
conn: i hope you are thinkning of a wish ...
i never hear him come out of the toilet with so much thoughts occupying my head.
me: i hope you flush.
conn: opps, sorry i forgot.
and with a twitch of his fingers, i heard the toilet flush. wow, he really have some powers.
me: have a coke, as i pointed to the drink.
conn: no no, sorry, i dun drink gasy drinks. they make me fat and bloat. do you have plain water?
ai yo, this guy so fussy, might as well dun drink. but holding my own CAN of drink makes me wonder. maybe that's why i am having the size i am having today. shall cut down, i reminded myself. i went to the kitchen to get both of us a glass of purified diamond water. then i saw the kitchen knife there on the sink. i took it and hide it at the back of my short and hide it well out of sight. i got a plan.
me: here's your water. dun worry, i never drug it.
conn: i know. but why you take the kitchen knife for what? you want to cut something?
i got caught with my act of wanting to kill conn and i quickly lie my way through.
me: oh ya, i want to let you have a look at this specially crafted knife. i think it is way better than your's cause it is sharper and better, to shave your apples, and it is quite cheap. if you buy one today, i will give you another one for free!! all for just $599 but wait, if you buy now, i will add in a very nice butter knife use to cut butter and spread on your bread. but wait, i know you still find it too expensive, so i am giving you one year supply of very fattening butter to go along with your butter knife. so how, interested to buy?
i look at conn with my innocent eyes and try my best to look real.
conn: cut the crap ... put the knife back. we still have serious business to do.
i gladly put the knife back, so silly of me to make up such a stupid story. i know i am not a good salesman nor a good lier so why bothered.
conn: so how, thought of your wish already?
me: no, not really. are there any restrictions to your wish, i mean, really any wish also can meh? how come so good one? better than winning 4D. lol.
conn: ya, there are some restrictions, like no harming of another person's life. includes no killing or wishing someone dead ....
me: damn, how i wish osama will die right now, so that there will be no more terrorist attacks on poor london. talking about london, why are you going to london for?
conn: cause london bridge is falling down ... no la, just joking.
me: orh, i never thought u CAN joke. ok, why did the chicken cross the playground?
conn: har ... dun know ... why?
me: to get to the other slide la ... haha haha.
conn: not funny, so you want to be a chicken? you want hen or cock?
me: a cock, but i want a really big one cause mine is a bit samll :(
just then i think i heard, pi pi poo pu pi ...
me: your michael farts again ...
conn: ya, he gets horny once in a while. enough of jokes ... tell me, what do you really want in your life?
me: i want money, lots of it ...
conn: really? no second thoughts?
a part of my brain said just go ahead with that wish, but another part of my brain says otherwise. there are so many things in life that i want to have. not just money. there are many things that money cannot buy. like love, relationship with family, friends, turning back time ... do i really just want the money?
me: ok, wait, i have second thought. i wish that the 911 incident had never happen.
conn: i am sorry, another restriction to granting a wish is that if something had already happened, i can't unchange it. for example if someone died long ago, i can't bring him back to life. your wish got to be something that have not happen before.
damn, so my wish of becoming a superstar on project superstar cannot happen already since weilian and kelly got it already. like reading my thoughts, conn said something that make me take aback.
conn: do you know how weilian got into the finals of project superstars on channel u and wins it? he made a wish and i make it happen for him. if not how you think he CAN get so far? i met him and grant this wish for him.
me: my God, no wonder he is always through to the next round and the next ... but why did he not choose to have his eye sight back when he can wish for that?
conn: hello ahbang aka brother, you never listen to me properly izzit? i said i can't undo things that had already happened. so of course i can't let him have his eye sight back. plus he says he is used to seeing things in the dark already and he really likes to sing and he wishs that he wins the superstar thing. i had granted his wish. i can make it happen for you too. so what is it?
wow, if conn can grant weilian his wish, i am sure he can grant my wish as well. so i must think of a really good wish so that i will not regret the decision i have made. come to think about it, i have many things i have done that i regret in my life. if really i CAN undo them, which one will that be? hmmm... i need to think really hard. just then, i hear a mobile phone ring. the ring tone is that of pink panther. funny, who will use such a ring tone? then conn picks up his handphone and answers it.
conn: what? how can this happen? he cannot do that. it is wrong. you must do it right away, if not it will get worst. yes, i am buzy now. he is buying it. i am convincing him and i think he is buying it. tell boss i be back soon. yes, michael is getting dry, so i need to top him up soon. got to go. bye.
i heard his conversation. weird stuff ... what top up? with oil? petrol? and who's buying it? i am not buying anything? just then, conn look over to me and gives me a grin. is that an evil grin? am i seeing things? oh no....
to be continue
# posted by Steven and Alvin @ 11:45 AM 
